I feel rather left out, I must confess--I don't experience limerence at all. But I agree that it seems unrealistic that only 5% of the population does, given its ubiquity in popular and high culture. For me, it was my lack of ability to relate to the ubiquitous romantic-love themes in fiction that first made me think I was unusual in this regard.
(I remember, as a teenager, trying to understand exactly what 'romantic love' was, that distinguished it from a combination of sexual attraction and friendship. In my model, being 'friends with benefits' was more or less what a romantic relationship amounted to.)
I have had crushes, and felt the pleasant butterflies-in-my-stomach feeling after interacting with my crush objects--and I assumed *that* was at least a mild form of limerence. But from your description, real limerence is pretty radically different.
I am not sure how limerence is different than love. But I agree with the importance of recognizing mortality.
Very interesting!
I feel rather left out, I must confess--I don't experience limerence at all. But I agree that it seems unrealistic that only 5% of the population does, given its ubiquity in popular and high culture. For me, it was my lack of ability to relate to the ubiquitous romantic-love themes in fiction that first made me think I was unusual in this regard.
(I remember, as a teenager, trying to understand exactly what 'romantic love' was, that distinguished it from a combination of sexual attraction and friendship. In my model, being 'friends with benefits' was more or less what a romantic relationship amounted to.)
I have had crushes, and felt the pleasant butterflies-in-my-stomach feeling after interacting with my crush objects--and I assumed *that* was at least a mild form of limerence. But from your description, real limerence is pretty radically different.
One of your best pieces, I greatly enjoyed it. Nietzsche is an interesting citation, because he seems to have never been loved.